So okay, most probably, this is going to be a long post... (yet, I feel a bit lazy to do this, but I think I have to..) ... most people these days, still can't understand what a goth is. Why? Because there are so many answers... Why are there so many answers? Because, there is the Goth (which is a member of the Germanic Tribe), and there is the gothic subculture, Goth (a boardgame), Goth (which is an ancient Teutonic race), Gothic art and architecture, and more that I guess, I haven't mentioned.

So, let's begin with stuff that I found in the web that may help you understand what the word means (of course, I'll be putting here stuff that I think, are the most accurate answers)[let's focus on the gothic subculture.](p.s. I'll just comment on some parts -- enclosed in *...*):

What is Goth?

This is probably the hardest question any goth could try and answer, one may as well ask 'what is society?' as it has so many facets it defies any definitive explanation.

Goth in its simplest form, is a subculture. A group of people who feel comfortable within each others company. There is no specific thing that defines what you need to do or be to fit into the goth scene (except of course the implied black clothing). People in the goth scene all have different musical tastes, follow different religions, have different occupations, hobbies, and fashion sense.
*Uhuh... but about the 'implied black clothing," though this is applied to Goths, that doesn't mean that you should always wear black. Then there is the "different musical tastes"; don't think that one likes metal, then one is into R&B (wtf? that isn't gothic.) Let's say a goth is into metal, and the other is into industrial, and another is into gothic (genre)*

The gothic stereotype

Many stereotypes of goths exist these days. It seems everyone has their own way to define 'what is goth'. From the stereotypes based on clothing to music right up to the stereotypes of all goths being satanists or part of some kind of cult. Categorically, all of these are false.

The goth scene is just as widely varied as society in general. There are many different professions represented in the scene, from highly skilled professionals like doctors and lawyers, to tradesman, to technically minded people to clerical workers. Many different musical ta stes exist (and not all of them goth, there is a HUGE 80's following in the goth scene for some reason). The fashion varies vastly from goth to goth from the traditional flowing victorian style garments to the buckled and studded style regalia (also called industrial style, which is often closely related with goths, and have come to an understanding of co-existance, if uneasily at times).

* Yeah... there are a lot of gothic stereotypes these days...*
* (Click on the image to see it on a larger view)


But they think weird!

Ah, but this is the beauty of goths. Most subjects that are taboo in 'normal' society are freely discussed and debated about. Death, religion, magick, mysticism, and many other topics that are only roached carefully outside of the gothic community. Most goths have realised that fear is only a reaction instilled in us by dogmatic propaganda, and once you realise there is nothing to fear from the topic, whats to stop you discussing it?

Goths often revel in the fear given to them by society as a whole. Often the behavior exhibited by society to them based on society's perception of them from stereotypes, rumour, etc are a constant source of entertainment. Of course, most of the rumours are totally unfounded, goths are people like everyone else, however when you already have a reputation, going for the shock factor is often far too tempting to see how much society at large is willing to believe (or deduce) with only a little encouragement.

This does not totally fall away once you get inside the scene unfortunately, and goths are all too often tempted to try for the shock factor within the scene (which turns out more tacky than shocking). Goths when you get down to it can be a rather pretentious bunch, trying for those extra 'goth points' on the gothier than thou scale, but it adds to the enjoyment.

*Yeah... that's the nice thing about goths. Goths are really nice and normal once you get to know them. It's just that, other people spread rumors about them that makes them have a bad reputation. Anyway, what's wrong with discussing death, religion, etc..?*

History of Goth

Modern goth (ignoring where the name itself originally comes from) started in the early 80's as part of the punk subculture (which is itself was a rejection of most societal values, and anything considered part of the 'norm'). The phrase was coined by the band manager of Joy Division, Anthony H. Wilson, who described the band as 'Gothic compared with the pop mainstream'. The term stuck, and as punk eventually died, Goth survived and became its own subculture. The punk clothing and hairstyles mellowed, and the core 'rejection of society' attitude alone lived on in the gothic subculture. Over time this itself has been modified to be more of a 'no more blind acceptance of society's values' as opposed to rejection because it was there to be rejected (and because you could get away with it!).

Movies such as The Crow, and bands such as the Bauhaus helped establish the gothic image as dark, depressing, and even evil. As more and more 'dark' movies came out, numbers in the gothic subculture expanded, and there is now a gothic community in almost every major city around the world, and quite a number of towns have their own representative contingent. Nowdays there are more goth bands around than ever, and it has turned from an 80's phenomenon into a 90's way of life for many people. Unlike the punk subculture that it spawned from, there even exists a class of mature goths, still following the scene around even past their 20's and into their 30's and beyond.

*Okay, that's all for now... I'll just update this if I have more time.*


If you have been reading my blog, then you know what this is:

"A punishment to some, to some a gift, and to many a favor."

Which is which? This depends upon the person... depends on when and how they would die. Someone in misery may say that this is a gift, given to them to end the pain. Others, a punishment for the things that they must regret. And to some, a favor, because they haven't got any choice...

Remembering the Past

I was checking my old files in my computer... then I opened a folder wherein I save there my important conversations with my friends... I can't believe that I find some things funny, and some things hurtful... though I must admit, that these are the reasons for what we are now today...

Different files, different stories...
  • At one file, I had this conversation with my friend, wherein he was asking me if he is in love or something, since he is thinking about this "girl" and this "girl" makes him smile, stuff like that.
This conversation happened last summer, about last April. When I've read it, I find it kinda funny since until now, he doesn't seem sure if he really loves this "girl." So what I did, I went online, and then sent the conversation to him... He said thanks for saving it and at the same time, his reaction was, "=))" (a smiley laughing out loud in ym). He was like, "U sure it is summer?" "U saved it? wahahaha" "Thanks anyway"

On the other hand, I won't say who this friend is, for safety purposes of course, since other people also read this blog, because it's not just you (whoever you are; whether you are one of my Gothic friends, friends, bestfriend, or some other student in school) who reads this blog and you might know who this person is...
  • Then at another file, I had there a conversation with my boyfriend, we were far from each other at that time since it was our summer vacation, and that was the time when I was like, with my family and really really far from him (distance = ride a plane!)... We were missing each other.. blah 3x.. we were talking (:P I can't put much details... confidential!
  • There was also a file wherein we were just teasing each other about different stuff... I find it really funny because we were like kids... like, preschool kids who are teasing each other yet crushing each other... somehow like that.. LOL
  • I also found some files wherein I was fighting with my friends (That was the time when they haven't accepted that I'm a goth...) [I guess they were just concerned (?) about me... or they really don't want me being a goth (?)] ... anyway, it was a long time ago and we are okay again with each other now. :)

New Layout

Finally... I have finished having my new layout.. yay!

This goth can now have a rest:

Though I must say, this blog looks differently in different browsers... anyway, now that I'm done with my blog's layout... I must now get busy fixing my profile in friendster.

John James Ingalls

Haha... I'm loving these death quotes...

"In the democracy of the dead all men at last are equal. There is neither rank nor station nor prerogative in the republic of the grave."
-John James Ingalls

On Joshua Bruns

I'm into reading death quotes these days... It made me want to share it in my blog.

Quote for today:

"The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.999 percent of them are made by people who are still alive. "
-Joshua Bruns

In this world, I'd day, "Duh..."; but in my world, I'd say, "Hmm... but what if souls in the other world (if there is such) also/still write death quotes?"

One Parable of the Bamboo

At times we tend to bend where the wind blows and at times we really do not know how will we ever bend if the wind is coming from both opposite directions. We get baffled to what side we're going to bend to, to get off the risks, to be on the safe track. We're just like bamboo grasses, but our difference is that we have free will and we are able to distinguish the different angles and points of our lives. At some point if we try to bend with the strongest that influence us because of certain reasons that might be doubt for example or reasons we are made to believe that is rather false to what is true; and that because of that wrong bend we break from our roots and there everything ends for us. At other times we came to realize what the truth really is and that we take the right bend or decision. And that by the wind is over we're more stronger on about facing storms because we have bended right we get even more rightly flexible: Taking a more wiser step.
Let us not just think twice on occurances that we encounter, and that when the road gets rough we should too get to think we need to get tough, let us not just think twice upon difficult circumstances but let us think trice upon making a decision or going say any matter to be conceived.
I hope what is happening today serves as a lesson for what might come tomorrow.

Mean Girls

Our play is done... It was a success. Everybody's performance was really good.

Damn, I can't believe that I wore shorts and a mini skirt at some scenes... Btw, some of us lost our money after the play. (Dunno... we were busy dressing up and acting... the play was already over when we noticed that our money has gone missing.)

Err... now, I'm really, really sick.
It was raining in the afternoon, when something happened that it pissed me off. Already in an asthma attack, I still made myself worse by walking under the rain -- not because I don't have an umbrella; but because I wanted to do it intentionally.

This was such a bad day. I wanted to cry but I can't because I had eyeliner on my eyes. If I cry, it's just going to ruin my face and it's not good to see since I'm in school. Damn, if I was only in my room at that time. Though this may seem kinda emotional, I just can't help it. I've been hurt a lot... Ouch!!!

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